Intimacy

Entering the Here and Now (Now What? Life After Sex Addiction, Part 2)

Sometimes you’ll hear an old-timer at a twelve-step meeting tell a newcomer, “Do what’s in front of you and let go of the results.” This age-old advice is about taking things one moment at a time when life feels overwhelming. It removes future expectations, to focus on the here and now.

What’s so great about living in the present? It’s where your life force is most accessible—an oasis of emotional sobriety is available there. In fact, resiliency and buoyancy only exist in the here and now. But it takes mental muscle for you to breathe into each moment, and until now that muscle has been only infrequently used. Later on, we’ll take a deeper look at . . .

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Turning Down the Volume on Shame (Part Four)

Learn how shame lives inside you, as well as your shame patterns. It’s a complicated emotion, but therapy and twelve-step work provide fertile ground to identify and heal these wounds. Read books about shame resiliency, too, and start a conversation about shame with confidants. By breaking out of isolation, you’ll take some of the power away from the shame and move toward more vulnerability and connection.

The language of shame can also be liberating. Begin to use . . .

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The Healthy Side of Narcissism (Part Two)

Trust takes shape over time with a person you can truly count on. But if your trust muscles were not strengthened as a child, it will take endurance to build them as an adult. Many years may be needed, even if you’re willing to be faithful to the process. Find your people—those who are steadfast supporters and also want to travel this trust journey with you. By investing in yourself, you’re . . .

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