I was a child perfectionist. Not your average version of perfection, but a card-carrying, practicing, CEO of childhood perfectionism. If I didn’t understand instructions given to me by my Hebrew teacher, I would have a meltdown. If my t-shirts were not hung up neatly on matching hangers in my closet, I would get anxious. If I didn’t finish everything on my to-do list, I would go into a shame spiral. It wasn’t classic . . .
Continue reading...Andrew Susskind
What’s the Purpose? (Part 2)
After the problematic sexual behavior has waned, you’re left with a blank canvas that holds endless possibilities. Yet, it can also be quite overwhelming and uncertain. Now that the compulsive sex is gone, who am I? What do I really want . . .
Continue reading...What’s the Purpose? (Part 1)
After the problematic sexual behavior has waned, you’re left with a blank canvas that holds endless possibilities. Yet, it can also be quite overwhelming and uncertain. Now that the compulsive sex is gone, who am I? What do I really want . . .
Continue reading...Anger as an Ally Part 2)
Normalize anger as a natural, necessary emotion. All of your feelings are valid and useful. By editing or censoring your anger, you’re removing a vital part of yourself. All emotions are welcome to the table. Identify and name your anger . . .
Continue reading...Anger as an Ally (Part 1)
Anger was palpable in my home. Unfortunately, my parents were unhappy in their marriage as far back as I can remember, leaving them with a hefty dose of rage and grief. I’m sure there was a time when they had fun and high hopes for a fulfilling life together, but these early dreams . . .
Continue reading...Is Love Addiction Real? (Part 2)
Now that Lori is recognizing the themes and patterns of her deeper longings, what are the tools and strategies she might consider? . . .
Continue reading...Is Love Addiction Real? (Part 1)
Lori arrived for therapy with tears in her eyes. “I did it again. I fell for another guy who was totally unavailable and once again convinced myself that he was the one. I don’t know if I can . . .
Continue reading...Love Avoidance:
Regulating the Emotional Distance (Part 2)
Face it. We all long for love yet push it away at times. This is the human condition. So how can you learn about this part of you? . . .
Continue reading...Love Avoidance:
Regulating the Emotional Distance (Part 1)
Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. ― Rumi
All of us come into the world defenseless and vulnerable, and in the best of circumstances, we have a good enough parent, . . .
Continue reading...Cultivating Contentment (Part 1)
I think I’ve always struggled with happiness although I do have some fond memories with neighborhood friends when I was a kid. On the inside of my home I saw a lot of suffering that showed up as competition, criticism and envy, just to name a few painful ingredients. My childhood was not a happy time of my life, but somehow I managed to shut the door to my bedroom and create a mini-sanctuary equipped with . . .
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